The shape of the pear

The Inconvenient Nonsense

2008-03-12T21:07:00.001Z

It must be something about the whiney voice of B-list celebs wittering on about the plight of the polar bear that just sets me off. I know they're are only playing up to their "cute" TV appearances, and indeed they and their cubs are cute on television or at a distance, but up close and in your face, they are bloody lethal.

Of course it's all about "Global Warming" and "Mans Impact On The Environment" the topics dear to the heart of anyone who needs to look "concerned". We should all be worried whenever the press reports that temperatures have not been this warm since the end of the last ice age some 12000 years ago.

I note that no one gave a rats arse about the furry elephants that we lost back then. Now they were cute.

Which of course might carry some weight were it not for one small, constantly glossed over fact that we are still coming out of this ice age, so of course it's going to get warmer, with or without our help.

Testing Testing, is this thing on

2007-11-08T20:05:00.001Z

Just trying out the new Windows Live Writer, hoping it'll do more of the work for me :)

I'll write again with something a little more sane later

My Life With an Addict

2007-08-15T21:20:00.000Z

Recently my evenings have taken a disturbing turn, filled with tortured screams of anguish, followed by short lived yelps of pleasure and delight. Cries of help echo around the house, and all normal activity has long been abandoned.

I am dealing with an addict, suffering the rage, frustration and stress until her next hit, and is constantly on the search to get to the "next level".

Thankfully it's all free, and I am talking about computer game addiction. My darling wife has found bloons, and more bloons, which by its insidious technique of constant rewards, has hooked another poor victim mercilessly.

Dont just take my word for it

2007-07-02T17:12:00.000Z

Even the trained professionals think it is all a bit naff

Too Stupid to be Terrorised

2007-06-30T16:16:00.000Z

Not me of course, but this latest round of muppetry. Never mind that two of their car bombs in london were found and defused before any problems, and this new lot did no real damage except to get themselves arrested.

fecking idiots

Big Brother is Watching

2007-05-30T21:49:00.000Z

And frankly with some of the contestants I can see why doors have "Push" on them, why the pool has a "Wet" sign, and the dinner table has "Eat". There's no helping some folk.

Still should be entertaining :)

Ok Maybe Games Are Bad For You

2007-05-29T20:50:00.000Z

There I've said it. Not that I've changed my stance, but those that believe otherwise and indeed try to make the laws against "violent" games have made them bad for a lot of needy people

Meanwhile people like this who would appear to tick a lot of boxes in the "potential psycho" category is actually a hero.

Meanwhile there are those that have seen it all before

Content Warning

2007-04-10T20:02:00.000Z

Please note that this blog may contain opinions

but more often than not, contains occasional ramblings

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

2007-03-17T19:42:00.000Z

I do

85% of the UKs electrical distribution network and vast areas of Australia is monitored by the software that I have a hand in writing. And last week I was the one providing on call support.

No pressure then.

Games in the News

2007-02-20T21:27:00.000Z

And not for the usual reasons either... Aparently we are training up to be healers

Also in news that will get most gamers blood racing. Girls (if you can find them) that play games have sex more often.

Who knew

Off to get the wife into Viva Pinata

The clock is Ticking

2006-09-28T08:15:00.000Z

How long before this is blamed on computer games.

Sometimes it seems like the only cause.

I'm Getting Business Cards Made

2006-08-22T16:15:00.000Z

I get an email.

"Our clients crashed 3 times can you take a look and fix it".

Did you get an error logs/messages? Did you get any core dumps or Dr Watsons? Anything useful at all?

Come on guys this is basic stuff, but no you guys just had to email:

Colin Cassidy - Psychic Debugger

The Female of the Species...

2006-08-21T20:26:00.000Z

According to some people games like this, this, or this are murder simulators.

Odd however that playing Madden does not actually make you a better American football player then.

However I wonder if anyone thought that The Sims in the hands of teenage girls would have been just as deadly

Only In Japan

2006-05-15T19:16:00.000Z

Would you be able to buy cans of air

Without a hint of irony

2006-05-05T20:27:00.000Z

Where I work is rolling out a new software purchase process, and in the email it says

"Utilizing best practices from" ... "and enhacing them" ...

Are you thinking what I'm thinking. If it's best practices how on earth can we possibly be improving them?

My Xbox 360

2006-05-05T20:23:00.000Z

has its own blog

damn thing posts more than I do as well

Poke in the Eye of Darwin

2006-03-10T20:35:00.000Z

This is nothing more than an attempt to get a religious idea taught as science. Nothing more, nothing less.

The US, surprisingly enough, have already had the forsight to remove it from their scientific curriculum given that they have a long standing seperation of religion from state.

The theory of evolution is quite simply a theory, which in scientific terms is held quite highly. Intelligent Design (creationism to you and me) barely ranks as a scientific hypothesis, and should have nothing to do with science

Oddly however you do not get the same religious arguments when it comes to the "Theory of gravity" (also just a theory). Not many Christians are suggesting that the earth sucks.

Not your Typical Hallmark Holiday

2006-02-23T22:07:00.000Z

March 20th

I Protest

2006-02-22T19:30:00.000Z

Since the Iraqi invasion, occupation, liberation call it what you will, the iraqi "rebels" have been bombing other iraqis left right and centre, and for the most part they've done nothing. Now they've bombed a shrine and now all of a sudden they're off to do something about it.

In other news, Pro Testers. Brilliant idea where do I sign up. Ironically that most ALF muppets (sorry members) have been vaccinated with vaccines, tested on, you guessed it, animals.

If you are going to be against animal testing at least have the decency and commitment not to use any of the products.

In Case You Ever Wondered

2006-01-25T23:25:00.000Z

If the Xbox Live thing down the right hand side would ever do anything... Today it does :)

Today I got myself a nice new shiny xbox 360 :)

Happy Happy Joy Joy

Get one yourself and join myself and other sad muppets with nothing better to do than play "murder simulators" as some Daily Mail readersmight think. But in reality these games do not teach me how to murder any better than playing a golf game will improve my swing.

I mean really who uses a mouse to kill people nowadays anyway, especially now that most of them are wireless you can`t even strangle anyone with it.

If you want something to blame may I suggest taking a look at the parents who buy little 12 year old billy that game that he keeps going on about, the one with those ugly creatures with their odd looking guns. But still it'll keep billy happy quiet, and more importantly out of the parents way So they can get on and watch the latest Soap/US hit TV show.

Billy, meanwhile, is building pipe bombs.

Slow down

2006-01-24T21:03:00.000Z

In the past we have had many government funded campaigns to reduce your speed whilst driving, each one has focused on some aspect of speeding that may tempt BMW drivers to slow down to just above the speed limit.

We have the foolspeed campaign highlighting the risks of not being able to slow down when someone leaps out in front of your car. BMW drivers care not a jot, except for having to turn on their wipers a little

More recently I noticed an attack on the wallet. If you slow down you will save fuel (and hence cash). Again this is doomed to failure If you are able to afford a BMW, and indeed foolish enough to part with the cash to own you, you are unconcerned where you money goes.

Now I have thought of a campaign that will get to the mindset of the BMW driver, and more importantly the mindset of the average driver, especially as this can be directed at said BMW drivers.

Slow down, it'll piss of the driver of the cars behind you.

See clearly this is a winner as nothing excites us more that annoying anyone we can, and in particular that git in his Beemer who seems hell bent on driving his car into your boot.

So there you have it a real reason to slow down

A Celebration of Britishness

2006-01-14T21:27:00.000Z

apparently we aren`t British enough. We should embrace our flag and celebrate what it means to be British (Never mind the fact that we are already "Great")

So we are going down the path of celebrating something that makes us different from the rest of the world, something that marks us out as special? Something that divides us a species on a small round planet hurtling through the vast void of space, where you cannot see a border, flags or people. I don`t see us hurriedly suggesting that we should celebrating Earthling Day.

To start with I guess we have to understand what exactly does it mean to be British? Does our cricket team have our uncompromising support every tour? Do we celebrate a major historical victory?

ultimately what makes most Brits "British" is that on this fair, green and pleasant land.

our parents fucked.

The Spirit of Christmas

2005-12-19T22:28:00.000Z

Eloquently put.

Nice Car, Shame About the Weather

2005-11-27T21:57:00.000Z

It was with a sense of amusement that I watched the weather affect our country the other day. Despite a weeks worth of warnings we were hit with snow and the country grinded, inevitably to a halt.

One story in particular amused me. Not for happened or it's outcome, but the unsaid story. One school was so snowed in that there was no way for the parents to drive up and collect their children.

Now as an observer of the school run, I've noticed that a large number of children are driven to school in SUVs, Jeeps, Hummers etc. Mostly in the mistaken belief that you are safer in a car the size, and with the fuel economy, of a tank.

In reality I am actually safer driving around in my little Citroen Saxo.

Now these same said tanks, for all their "safety", "sports utilityness" and "4 wheel driveness" couldn`t make it through the snow to get to the school that they daily dropped their children off at. Money well spent.

When my little one starts the school run I'll be buying Snow Cat.

Without a Trace of Hypocracy

2005-11-11T20:16:00.000Z

Aparently this is a bad thing

Where as this is something that we should be allowing.

Now of course you'll hear the arguments that we need 90 days detention because there is so much information stored and encrypted on computers nowadays. However maybe the government and the police forgot about this little law.

Which, in a nutshell, states that if you have encrypted data of any kind, you must disclose the password/key. And indeed if you fail to hand over the key you are implicitly guilty.

So I'll ask the question, if we are obliged by law to hand over the key to the encrypted information when asked, why the hell should we be detaining suspects for 90 days?

So Here I Am

2005-10-09T12:31:00.000Z

In at work in a sunday, creating that which doesn`t yet exist, but the sales team has already sold :)

Only to find the damn sales team in selling more things that don`t exist yet.

Jeez this thing never ends.

WOOOHOOO

2005-10-04T21:40:00.000Z

I'm starting the queue at the cinema now. Who's with me?

Our furtune telling roof

2005-09-07T22:19:00.000Z

Some of the regular readers may be aware that last christmas our roof leaked, and at the same time a huge tsunami wiped out vast tracts of indonesia et al.

Now can you guess, in light of Hurrican Katrina, what our roof did a couple of weeks ago?

Yep you guessed it, another leak.

Next time I spot a leak I will be sure to report it to all the disaster management centres throughout the world, they have a right to know!

look over there in the distance.

2005-07-08T09:51:00.000Z

common sense

don`t just take my word for it.... here it is straight from the hourses mouth...

ID cards wouldn't have stopped bombs, UK minister says

G8 And All That Jazz

2005-07-02T19:16:00.000Z

"400,000 people marched in Edinburgh to show the 8 most powerful leaders of the world that we want to end poverty" - came the headline...

Nice, but don`t expect them to do the same for next years G8. In fact expect most of them to watch, on telly, the marching/demonstrations/mob violence that occurs in the next hosting country.

Lets correct the original statement if we may. Firstly they are not the 8 most powerful leaders, they are the (for democratic countries at least) the 8 duly elected representatives of the 8 largest economic countries of the world.

Noting now that they were, mostly, elected; how many of the 400,000 marchers actually voted in the election earlier this year. Statistics would say that less that 200,000 voted, and that is assuming that all 400,000 were of voting age.

Rather than waiting for a big event such as this, we, as individuals, as voters, and members of communities, have the power to change anything we want whenever we want.

As someone far more eloquent with words once said:

"We have an obligation to one another, responsibilities and trusts. That does not mean we must be pigeons, that we must be exploited. But it does mean that we should look out for one another when and as much as we can; and that we have a personal responsibility for our behavior; and that our
behavior has consequences of a very real and profound nature. We are not powerless. We have tremendous potential for good or ill. How we choose to use that power is up to us; but first we must choose to use it. We're told every day, "You can't change the world."

But the world is changing every day. Only question is...who's doing it? You or somebody else? Will you choose to lead, or be led by others? "
-- JMS Apr 7 1996

Any excuse...

2005-06-01T18:45:00.000Z

Based on no firm evidence, and heresay at best piracy is helping terrorism

I wont go on to mention that these is slightly more evidence that buying oil from Middle East countries is also funding terrorism.

So movie swappers better not be filling up your cars either

Something to Ponder

2005-05-27T07:14:00.000Z

It occured to me whilst watching a debate on Fox News (well I say debate....), that historically, America was a haven for those in europe who felt pursecuted for their religion.

Meanwhile Australia was a dumping ground for our criminal elements.

Given that, which country seems most fucked up right now...?

In A Record Store Near You

2005-05-24T06:55:00.000Z

Actually the deal with Music CDs is a little more complicated than my last blog entry. CD single and album sales are indeed falling, though the music Labels are still producing massive (and increasing) profits year on year. Personally I would say this has a lot to do with the marketed pish that they produce

Even though, the music industry in it's current form is ultimately doomed to failure.

The main problems is the intrinsic value of a CD nowadays. You walk into any record shop (HMV, Virgin etc) and you can pick up any back catalogue CD from a semi decent artist for about £15.

For you £15, you will get about 1 hour 20 mins of material (about as much as you can fit onto a CD. If you're lucky you may get a double CD in which case you might be over the 2 and a half hour mark.

Now if I continue to wander around the shop eventually I'll stumble across the DVD section and realise for that same £15, I can in fact pick up, say LOTR special edition.

Thats 3 hours of movie.

On top of that you have 4 audio commentaries. Meaning that I would have to watch the movie another 4 times to listen to all that.

That 15 hours of entertainments, and that's only the first 2 discs!

On the remaining discs there will be about 3-4 hours of documentaries and another hour or so of stills, test animations, music snippets etc.

All in: About 20 hours of material.

So with your £15 what gives you more bangs for your bucks?

Conflicting messages

2005-05-23T18:44:00.000Z

Aparently this is a bad thing.

Perhaps because it can lead to this?

And you'll find exactly the same with the music industry.

Here endeth the sermon.

Yeah Like it Was A Suprise

2005-04-28T20:24:00.000Z

Well this is about as exciting as the election is going to get, a whole bunch of people are surprised that the legality of the war in Iraq is questionable.

Jeez guys wake up and smell the coffee, the whole premise was a joke to begin with, anything in the way was clearly glossed over.

OK Here's the science bit.

Iraq = lots of oil
USA = user of lots of oil
Cost of getting oil out of these countries = expensive.

Cost of invading on a false premise, finishing off Daddy's job, allowing a whole bunch of companies bribing, sorry contributing to the much needed funds of the elected representatives of the people, so they can get a piece of the action...

Priceless.

The fact of the matter is that our troops are in there now, doing the best to ensure the safety of themselves and that of the Iraqi people, who have long been persecuted by its own leaders. Maybe things aren`t great for them yet, but it is a small step in the right direction.

We are at this point now, there is little that can be done by dwelling on it. Support the troops there now, hope for their safe return, and vote for someone who has the balls to say no to cash once in a while.

Oh and for the 43% of people that didn`t vote in the last election, and who are bitching now. You have to shut up as you had you chance to say something 5 years ago.

The Chunky KitKat - Gods Own Chocolate Biscuit

2005-04-13T18:23:00.000Z

Some things just aren`t the same anymore. For example, the 4 finger KitKats or indeed 2 fingered KitKats. No longer are they wrapped in foil and covered with the famous red packaging. Which allowed seconds of delight as you tore through the foil to break the fingers apart.

Instead it's now the "sealed for freshness" - impossible to get into foil wrap. Thus ruining the whole KitKat experience.

That said they have redeemed themselves perfectly with the creation of the Chunky KitKat Which has to be the ultimate in chocolate biscuit delights.

Some would say that because it is no longer multiple fingers of biscuit, that it is no longer a KitKat. But I ask you, could you munch your way through 2 fingers of Chunky KitKat?

No I thought not either.

So there you have it, original KitKats - ruined, Chunky KitKats - perfection.

Here endeth todays sermon.

Oh and as an aside, a comment from the wife of a work collegue (who happens to be a minister)
Seen on the back of a cement mixer - "We can fill in your holes"

Ban Sunday Shopping

2005-03-05T18:52:00.000Z

I'm starting to believe that there may be something in not allowing shops to open on a sunday.

Not quite for the same altruistic reasons that the "Keep Sunday Special" brigade would have you believe. My reasons are entirely to do with the fact that shopping on a Sunday is a very dangerous business in our household. Examples:

Our first house... bought on a Sunday
Our first car... bought on a Sunday (shortly before moving into first house!)
Our first big telly... bought on a Sunday
Our first computer... bought on a Sunday
All of our pets... bought on a Sunday
Our Second Car... Bought on a Sunday
Our second house... Bought on a Monday (because the Banks aren`t open on a Sunday!)

As you can see quite expensive. Now to continue this story, last friday the wife and I had a conversation about the current state of the car and the fact that it might be worth looking at a smaller one jsut to nip to and from work in.

So... Saturday we have a similar discussion and decide that we would go and look (purely for investigative purposes and to see what we would get for our car). I realised at that point that this would not simply be a Recon mission, that we would infact have bought the damn thing by the next day.

Next day.

True to form we've only gone and said yes to their offer.

Today we picked it up :)

So for the sake of my finances I am imploring you all to write to your MPs, SMPs, EMPs declaring that Sunday shopping be banned

When in trouble...

2005-02-23T22:54:00.000Z

... or in doubt.
Run around, scream and shout.

Lesson for today, if you are coding a change for a bunch of customers. Who have all agreed to the change, and in fact specifically asked for it.

Remember to add a way to turn the damn thing off, cos when they get it thats the first thing they'll want to do.

Random Fixer of Bugs

2005-02-08T19:13:00.000Z

Or at least that's what I think my title at work should be.

Imagine...

Them: STUFF'S BROKEN

Me: My Stuff?

Them: STUFF'S BROKEN

Me: Do I even work for you?

Them: STUFF'S BROKEN

Me: Am I even the best person to look at this?

Them: STUFF'S BROKEN

Me: What about the work that I am meant to be doing?

Them: STUFF'S BROKEN, FIX!

So once more I am called into service to fix "Broken stuff" that has nothing to do with me, for people I don`t work for, when I am neither the best person to look at it, nor do I have the time.

Well that would have been the conversation that happened today, but I ducked out early. As it happens, it has a little to do with me. Tis an interesting story with the following moral:

If you are involved in programming, have nothing to do with interfaces!

An interface is a program that translates messages from one system to allow it to talk to another.

We have system A that sends messages to system B via an interface that translates the messages:

System A ------> Interface -----> System B

And indeed the interface manages messages back again.

System A and the interface are ours, System B is the customers

I was the last person to touch this interface, and therefore I have become the expert.

So you see when a messages does not appear at "B" as it should, blame immediatly falls on the interface, and hence me.

Now I have tackled a dozen such issues since I worked on the interface, and none (let me repeat) NONE have had anything to do with the interface. Messages were never sent to the interface in the first place. And yet dispite this the finger of blame always points to the interface first.

Sigh, and yet I am still chosen to fix these issues.

Still at least I know what I am doing tomorrow

Devils Advocate and Dirty Pictures

2005-01-26T19:23:00.000Z

We'll get on to the dirty pictures in a little while :)

Anyone who know me and has had any kind of =discussion about life, the universe, politics etc, has probably noticed my habit of taking the position of devils advocate.

Not sure why I tend to do this, but I suspect it is because all my friends are reasonable people with reasonable and similar views to myself. So if we all sat and agreed with one another, then we would have little to talk about.

I agree.

It's not that I necessarily accept these points as my own, but I think it is more challanging to defend a position that you yourself do not necessarily hold.

So with that in mind...

I was watching a discussion programme on the TV about the amount of Aid sent to Asia after the tsunami, compared to the budget put aside for the "Freeing of the Iraqi people" (read oil). And in particular I caught a point made by a UN aid mentioning something like:

"If everyone in the richest countries all gave 2 pounds a year, then we could prevent 30000 people a year dying of malaria in Africa"

No other context was given.

Now that is a lovely sentiment, and nearly had me reaching down the back of the sofa to hunt out for this years donation.

Only 2 pounds and I would be helping to save those poor people. 2 pounds a year and I could sit and feel happy and not at all guilty.

However. If we all managed this small feat, and indeed saved 30000 people. What kind of life would be left for them to now live? Their countries don`t have enough resources to cope with the population as it stands, and now we are adding a huge population increase on top of that, in turn increasing demand on resources, and an increased rate population growth (what else are these 30000 people going to do!??)

Instead of malaria, we have now condemed these people to starve for the rest of their lives, affecting those who may just have had a chance were it not for the tousands of "saved" people before them.

And yet this point was raised as if this was the solution to the problem.

Sorry guy's it's not a simple as that.

As a postscript to all this, a certain Bill Gates Donated $750 Million to immunise all the children of the poor african nations...

--

Andhoo those dirty pictures that you have all been waiting for.

I've been spending the week on a training course (getting in early before they cut the training budget!) and whilst there a couple of coworkers were showing off their new mobile phones, so I took a look at one, and looking in the "multimedia folder" and just before I could make out that I was looking at a thumbnail (and it was given the size of the screen) of a naked person. The phone was snatched away from me :)

As far as I could tell it was just a pink looking blob, but I was assured that it was a picture of the mans naked pregnant wife in the bath (covering up her modesty)

See it was hardly worth the wait, but let that be a lesson to all you budding "photographers", don`t leave your piccies where they can be found.

Happy New Year

2005-01-01T13:25:00.000Z

For those that follow this particular calendar, otherwise enjoy the random celebrations that are occuring around you.

Time for those resolutions. Bearing in mind that if I fail in giving anything up I can try again for Lent :)

Actually my only resolution is to continue to sell my soul to Microsoft and learn C#. This will be greatly aided by the fact that I am away on a two week training course as soon as I am back off holidays.

Might even get to put it to use this time.

perspective

2004-12-27T19:43:00.000Z

Our roof is leaking, Just a little bit over the bay window. Will probably get fixed tomorrow and have to be paid for by us.

On any other day this would be a household catastrophy. But there are tens of thousands of people in the india-asia regions whose house, life, loved one has been washed away.

Thought are with them, bugger the leaky roof

whats this for again

2004-12-17T21:40:00.000Z

long time no posty. I blame Halo2, HL2 and the winddown to xmas. Nothing much to add really, except to thank whomever "sorted" a certain Home Secretary from our government. Not that I had anything against him personally except that I think he's been the most paranoid man to ever be in charge of prisons, immigration, home security.

Still hopefully the new guy will realise that ID cards wont work

Halo there Ghost, oops, you passed right through me

2004-11-29T20:16:00.000Z

Halo day was a much merryment, one main organised Slayer League 5 rounds of first to 15, winner gets 7 points, second 6 and so on: Results as follows:

1st "Dunkster" 33 points
2nd "Solitaire" 31 points
3rd "Darklord" 25 points
4th "Flea" 16 points
5th "Ferrieboy" 15 points
6th "Ashie" 11 points
7th "Timbandit 9 points

So did not bad for the newcomer, won 2, came second in 2 and third in another. I base my success on gleefully running everyone down with the ghost at any available oportunity.

I also recommend the plasma sword for the lethal dispatching of close by competitors.

Apart from that random games of Slayer and CTF pasked the 8 solid hours of carnage.

Other tactics of choice include (but not limited to!)

Dual Wielding:- There was much debate as to the merits of dual wielding, though I recommend the two following combinations if you can get away with it:

- Plasma pistol and any other rapid fire weapon. Charge up the plasma pistol and know out all the shields with that and then follow up with the other gun :)

- Twin needlers. Now there's an oportunity to skewer someone good and proper, only takes 8 hits to get them exploding.

Shotgun:- get up close and personal

Plasma sword:- Makes a very good CTF defensive weapon

Flag:- Odd one this but got a beauty of a kill as an opponent wandered by (didn`t spot me) and took a blow to the back of the head and went down like a sack of spuds

Wraith:- In Waterworks, I recommend taking the wraith and camping right outside the enemy base simply killing anything that move and destorying all the vehicles. They have a hard time getting out, and when they did they had to run everywhere.

And obviously the best tactic of all is jump in a ghost and boost your way through anyone foolish enough not to have jumped. And if they have jumped wait until they land and then boost.

Now all I have killed them all constantly and hate me I probably wont be invited again. But that's OK I can always nip in on my ghost for a flying visit

Escaping the In-Laws (and other ways to spend money)

2004-11-26T19:21:00.000Z

Actually it's more a case of coincidental timing. Having popped into town on my lunch break and picked up Myst and Homeworld: cataclysm for £4 each, that gives me an excuse for tonight.

Tomorrow I'm off with xbox, telly and Halo (1 and 2) to link up with some friends of a friend for a Halo Lan party, much consumption of snackage, and general carnage will ensue.

I'll see if I am actually any good, I'm not too bad at the old FPS particularly CTF varients, as I tend to be the last person anyone sees just before they nearly touch our flag (it's not camping, it's defending... Fully armoured... with a rocket launcher) Of course it very easy when they only come in ones or twos :) Will let you all know how well I did.

Of course I'll have to think of something for sunday, and then I'm back to work.

If you build it...

2004-11-15T20:46:00.000Z

Ship it without testing.

Well at least that was the story of today.

Oooh our SOAP server application isn`t working, it wont link to any perl libraries. Well isn`t that just swell. Once again I have no idea what the problem is, never seen this application before, but give it to me I'll solve it.

Anyhoo after a whole day noodling on google, and perlmonks (including a post that made it to the front page (woohoo)

Anyway I eventually had a test program that worked, and a real one that didn't. So the trick is to change teh one that works into the one that didn`t and work out why.
step one strip out all the files from the Makefile that is currently built and add my working program.

Build.

Test. Fails...

oooh interesting, tis a build issue. Look at the makefile and sure enough on this platform (AIX) it`s built differently, links to differently libraries.

God only knows why. Though I can hazard a guess. Making it work like everything else (i.e. linking to all the libraries) bring up a whole bunch of errors about things already being defined. (this is a throw back to a DEC TRU64 problem where you have to link all your libraries twice just to make the damn thing work!). But this nontheless produced a working copy.

So anyway fixed the build/makefiles properly and it all seems much happier now (god only knows what else is broken though.

I guess someone (who has already been slapped) just added enough libraries that would get it to build without error, and never testing the damn thing until it gets onto customer kit (at least it was their test kit and they are going through their test period).

Sigh

Revenge of the Sequels 2: The Return

2004-11-12T13:59:00.000Z

Halo 2 arrived yesterday, and it rocks.

Played two games of multiplayer, got my arse handed to me on the first game, and then managed a respectable middle of the table on the second. Then started to through the campaign.

Just finished rampaging over the road in a tank, an action I recommend to anyone. So plenty more action to come.

All I have to do is complete it by Tuesday because that's when Half-Life 2 (which is currently sitting taking up Gigabytes of tantalising yet untouchable space on my hard-drive) becomes available to play.
0800 GMT no less.
So apologies if I am late in to work that day

I think I'll invent a new illness "sequelitis"

That's it

2004-11-04T19:00:00.000Z

I'm officially crap at my job.
Before I go any further I should point out that this wasn`t my code, but I was asked to take a look at it and work out why the function was undefined.
Here's a snippet:

/**************************************************
*F
*F Name: some_func
*F
*F Synopsis: does some stuff
*F
*F Inputs: int stuff
*F
*F Outputs: None
*F
*F Returns: status
*F
*F Globals: None
*F
*F***********************************************
*F
*F This funtion does stuff
*F
*F***********************************************

int some_func(int stuff)
{
int status = 0;
/*
* Do some stuff
*/
return(status);
}

Can you see what the problem is (apart from the lack of any real functionality)?

Answers on a postcard to:
I forgot to terminate my comment block Competition
PO BOX 3141
...

GAH!

What is even more embarresing is that there is a similar piece of code in our job interview test

Though in my defence I would like to point out that I use an editor that highlights the syntax and would have spotted this a mile off. And it was 5PM and I was about to head home.

US media coverage of the elections

2004-11-03T08:34:00.000Z

It is with a sense of amusement that I watch the coverage of the US elections. Given that I come from the UK (where we exported Democracy to the world through our Empire) I missed most of the days ramblings, and got up at about 0600 GMT.

So surfing through the dozen or so news channels (Sky, BBC, ITV, CNN, FOX etc... ) I noticed that they were all keeping a running total of the votes.

However....

They were all different.

Now correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought that the NEWS dealt with facts, or at least is meant to. But no, we are now dealing with broadcasters (people who stand in front of a camera and manage to read the autocue) making predictions.

Me, I think I'll wait for the counting to be over.

First Post

2004-11-03T08:23:00.000Z

Thought that I had better put something up so here goes. Decided to start this blog shortly after my darling wife did, so at least we have way s of finding out what it is we do with our time ;)

Why "The shape of the Pear"? Well I always thought that if I were to write my memoirs that this would be a good title, basically describing how everything is going pear shaped.

In terms of content, I suspect it will contain random thoughts and rants about various topics such as work (software development, in my role I get to QA other peoples code, so you may see the odd code snippet that is just plain wrong but amused me nonetheless)

Well I'll sign off for now and get back to my real job